Four Cousins and A Christmas (2021)

3.7/10

Four Cousins and A Christmas Storyline

A heart wrenching loss reunites four cousins to share one crazy night forcing walls to come down – over a little Pizza and Whine.

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Four Cousins and A Christmas Movie Reviews

Abysmal

Would have given zero if I could. This film was terrible. This didn’t fell Christmassy at all, not that I actually like Christmas films. The plot didn’t go anywhere, with the grand daughter just suddenly deciding to apologise to the grandad, with no resolution over what happened between him and her mum.

Also the way the film cut from one scene to another with no real connection.

The really weird thing was the soundtrack, after they sang Silent Night. I thought the aunt was high from spiked gingerbread men.

And the ending, everyone just has a group hug and that’s it.

That Casper guy was also weird, I have no idea what he was doing with his face in the family picture.

Just awful!

What an awful family! I wouldn’t want them to even attend, let alone sing at my funeral.

This isn’t the nice and sweet Christmas film that we usually get and maybe that’s what they were going for, which would explain why they chose the scariest (Yes including Sloth) Fratelli brother (The Goonies – 1985) to be the grandfather and gave him a terrible wig to boot.

It starts off pretty shrill and girly even before it really gets in to it.

The family tree at the beginning did help as there seemed to be a cast of hundreds, but sadly it continued to prove that Whine was the right word! (In the USA it’s called Pizza And Whine). What a miserable b!tch the leading lady was.

She, among others, was quite childish and even the way it was laid out, the freeze frames and narration made it feel like it was aimed at pimply teenagers.

There wasn’t even any hotties to look at. The guy with the abs didn’t have the face to back them up and is obviously gay in real life, he should have got together with Seb instead, which might have made it more realistic, although Seb was what I call a vile gay. And Casper was just a freak! I didn’t understand if it was deliberate or if he was sleeping with the director? The best character was Uncle Tommy.

There were many points where I nearly turned it off, however as it was so short I stuck with it, but I really wish that I hadn’t lost that time.

Overall I’d say that it was absolutely ridiculous and the soundtrack was insane.

It’s far too miserable for a Christmas film and not made in that Christmassy way. It was also a depressing story, which could actually have been set in the middle of July and no one would have noticed.

Poor, poor, poor!

0.25ish?/10.

What!!!

So I have a question… WHAT. WAS. THAT????

Scenes getting cut earlier than normally, cringy acting, weird angle filming, bizarre transitions between scenes , lazy humor. Come on… what is this?