The Loved Ones (2009)

6.6/10
73/100
98% – Critics
73% – Audience

The Loved Ones Storyline

On a bright and sunny day, one high school senior’s happy life soon changes in a flash. Attempting to avoid a bloody figure in the road, Brent Mitchell swerves his car around a tree, killing his father. Constantly confronted by the guilt of his father’s death and his mother’s emotional collapse after the accident, Brent escapes into a marijuana-fueled world of loud metal music to block out the pain and guilt from within. Dejected and out of sorts, he has one shot at happiness with his girlfriend Holly, a grounded, caring, and loving girl with good looks that can drop people dead; a perfect dream date for his high school prom. However, his plans are thwarted by an untimely kidnapping leading up to a disturbing series of events that take place under a mirrored disco ball, involving pink satin, glitter, syringes, nails, power drills and an obsessed secret admirer assisted by her father. Brent has become the prom king at a twisted, sadistic event where he is the entertainment. Will he be able to escape, or will he be trapped forever by his deathly admirer’s hand?

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The Loved Ones Movie Reviews

Trashy, derivative nonsense

I’d heard good things about THE LOVED ONES, and I was looking forward to seeing it: it promised a level of Antipodean nastiness on par with the quietly disturbing WOLF CREEK, another opportunity for the Australians to get one over on Hollywood. Sadly, it turns out to be a quite awful movie, almost descending to the level of amateur filmmaking on more than one occasion. This is derivative bunkum that offers a few nice establishing shots of the outback, but that’s about it.

The small-scale storyline is about a crazy girl whose offer to accompany her chosen partner to the prom is rejected, leading to a rampage of revenge. It sounds ridiculous, and CARRIE this ain’t: THE LOVED ONES is content to emulate rather than innovate and has little to do with reality. In the end, it turns out to be nothing more than a HOSTEL-inspired, strapped-to-a-chair torture flick. It’s totally unbelievable with it, especially in regards to how much punishment a body can undergo while still functioning normally.

The plotting is so thin on the ground that there are loads of unnecessary scenes to make the movie longer: endless, needless sex scenes, dull dialogue, and a totally extraneous sub-plot involving a goth girl attending the prom that’s just there to pad things out another twenty minutes. Sure, there are flashes of interest – the usual bizarre rural families (see STORM WARNING for a similar, better movie) for whom craziness is a way of life, some outrageous dinner table scenes (c.f. BRAINDEAD), and John Brumpton’s character, who belongs in a better movie. But for the most part, THE LOVED ONES is a total turn-off.

bloody torture fun

Brent Mitchell kills his father in a car accident after avoiding a bloody guy in the middle of the road. Six months later, he is haunted into a danger-seeking weed-smoking haze. He is attending the school dance with girlfriend Holly and gently turns down the awkward Lola Stone. His schlubby friend Jamie asks out hot girl with attitude Mia Valentine. Lola’s father kidnaps Brent. Lola throws a disturbing private End of School Dance in their den with her father and the lobotomized Bright Eyes. Brent’s mother Carla and Holly suspect foulplay while Jamie goes out with Mia.

It’s bloody. It’s torture. It’s teen melodrama. Robin McLeavy has a great insanity. The story does meander a bit. I’m not sure if Jamie and Mia are that directly connected to the action but their date is a good break from the torture. Overall, it’s a good bloody time.

Austrailian rules prom night

Brent (Xavier Samuel) is going to the prom with his girlfriend Holly (Victoria Thaine). When wallflower Lola (Robin McLeavy) asks him to go with her, he politely turns her down. The opening scene and DVD cover set the stage for the brutal torturous scenes that follow.

Pot/Metal head Brent has his issues as does the Valentine family which develops later on. Robin McLeavy provides us with some odd passive demented sexuality in a good performance on an old genre.

Guide: F-word (in music) sex and nudity (Victoria Thaine)