Flash Gordon (1980)

6.5/10
58/100

Flash Gordon Storyline

Flash Gordon is an American football player who along with Dale Arden are returning to New York City after a long vacation, until the plane they are passengers on crashes into the laboratory of Russian scientist Dr. Hans Zarkov. Both Flash and Dale become unwilling passengers on-board Zarkov’s rocketship as Zarkov sets a course for the planet Mongo. Arriving on Mongo, Flash and his companions find the planet is under the rulership of the evil Emperor Ming the Merciless and Ming is attacking Earth with natural disasters as he bids to destroy Earth. Realizing that Earth and the human race is in mortal danger, Flash decides to unite the kingdoms of Mongo and combine the forces of rivals Prince Barin and Prince Vultan to rescue Dale, who is to become Ming’s wife and defeat Ming and save Earth from annihilation.

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Flash Gordon Movie Reviews

If Star Wars & the original Batman TV series had a kid, it would be… FLASH! Ahh-AHHH

Geez, I think my title summed up everything that needs to be said. “Flash Gordon” has all the sci-fi and action as “Star Wars” but blended with an unapologetic campiness and comic bookishness like the iconic 60s Batman series. Throw into the mix, um, QUEEN doing the soundtrack, and you’ve got yourself an experience that will never happen again.

You might be thinking the blend I just described is as ill-advised as putting pineapple on pizza (seriously does anyone really like that?), but actually the blend is perfect if we take a quick look at the decade that this film wraps up, the 70s. The 70s was the decade of the rock opera: The Who’s “Tommy”, the doo-wopper “Grease”, Motown’s “The Wiz”, the punkish “Rocky Horror” and bunches of others that swept the box office. While “Flash Gordon” isn’t a musical, as defined by characters breaking out into song & dance, the vibe of the movie spells rock opera with a capital Rock. In plain terms this means a very tongue-in-cheek, over-the-top, theatrical and colorful spectacle that is not to be taken as a straightforward drama. If you can grasp that concept, I guarantee you’ll love this flick.

The plot? Who cares. Something about saving the universe, I’m sure. But it doesn’t matter because, like a good roller coaster ride, or like a good adventurous vacation, we don’t care how it’s mapped out. We just get a thrill out of each individual twist & turn, each scene, each surprise, and all the while we’re taking mental notes of all the horribly awesome lines we can quote to our friends and annoy them for months afterwards.

A serious note about the acting. This production drew the talents of some of the finest actors of stage & screen, and for them to be able to play such campy characters is a testament to their true expertise. I’m talking dramatic & Shakespearean legends like Brian Blessed, Max von Sydow, Timothy Dalton, not to mention the incomparable personality of Topol (Fiddler on the Roof) and the show-stealing, sexually repressed Ornella Muti as the Emperor’s daughter–whose mere presence would’ve kicked the MPAA rating from PG to PG-13 if that designation had existed back then. Even if you don’t recognize any of these people, you’ll find each one of them to be unforgettable.

“Flash Gordon” is a film that has no equal. You could say it’s a distant cousin to 1968’s “Barbarella” (another wtf experience that shouldn’t be missed), but really it’s beyond compare. So hurry up and see this movie …you only have 14 hours to save the earth!

Dreadful….just dreadful

This is a remake of the old Buster Crabbe serial from the 1930s. The plot is pretty much the same–Flash is a super-hero from the present who is Earth’s hope against the vicious Ming the Merciless. And, like the original, the doctor and Flash’s hot girlfriend are along for the ride.

1979-1980 were not great years for cinema–mostly because these were among the most garish and tacky years in human history. Tons of loud and annoying films came out these years that simply can’t be matched. Think about it–XANADU, THE APPLE, ROLLER BOOGIE, CAN’T STOP THE MUSIC and FLASH GORDON all came out during this two year stretch–proving that the final years of disco were dreadful for film audiences. All featured exceptionally garish music and costumes–so bold and tacky that you have to see it to believe it.

What is so amazing about FLASH GORDON is despite it looking tacky in every possible way, it was actually a big-budget film–with music from Queen and expensive special effects. Oddly, however, while Queen was a great rock group (one of my favorites), their tunes were just god-awful and stupid–blaring insipidly throughout the film. And the special effects just looked cheesy and loud.

Even more odd is that despite spending money on music and special effects, the script looks pretty sad and many of the actors are second-rate. Why they chose a complete unknown like the ultra-bland Sam Jones to play the lead is a mystery. Also, for formerly respected international stars like Max Von Sydow, Timothy Dalton and Topol (Tevye from FIDDLER ON THE ROOF), it’s a mystery why they would sign on to co-star in such a sad effort.

Overall, this is bad film and nothing really works. A complete incompetent mess on every level. However, take heart–it is so bad, so silly and so full of cheese that it’s a bit of a cult favorite as bad film fans love to watch it and laugh at its ineptitude. Some prime bad scenes involve the football scene, watching the hawk-men fly as well as the 2000 times you hear Queen inanely blare out “FLASH…Ahh, ahh!!!”–you just need to see and hear it to believe it. If you like bad film, then by all means watch it. Otherwise, stay clear–it is one giant and resounding bomb.

Camp but great fun- a guilty pleasure says I

Yes, the plot is silly, yes the dialogue is cheesy and yes, some of the special effects are badly done, but nonetheless it is great fun. Like Rocky Horror Picture Show, Congo and Jingle All the Way, Flash Gordon is a sort of guilty pleasure of mine. The costumes are quite extravagant and the sets are exotic. Then you have an irresistibly killer soundtrack from Queen, who also brought us the classics We Will Rock You and Bohemian Rhapsody. The direction is pretty good and the acting is surprisingly great. Sam J Jones is bad with his cheesiness but he was fun besides, thank goodness he wasn’t bland like Justin Whalin from Dungeons and Dungeons, and Melody Anderson is charming and alluring as Dale. Brian Blessed is very hammy as Vultran but he is great fun regardless and Topol, who was so superb in Fiddler on the Roof, is memorable as Dr Hans Zarkov. And while Ornella Muti is a wonderfully witty and sexy Princess Aura, it is Max Von Sydow who walks away with the picture, pantomime of course but sinister as well and I appreciated that. Overall, not perfect and camp personified, but very enjoyable. 7/10 Bethany Cox